October 7, 2016. Friday. I had two breakdowns on that day (~9:45AM & ~11AM). Life is so good for me that it made me cry like the little bitch like I am in my room and in the Old Humanities Building in UP Los Baños. /sarcasm
Just like my orgmate (and friend) in UP Los Baños, “It’s beyond your control.” It’s true, especially if you’re just dealing all of your problems in life by yourself. It’s noxious that you’re killing yourself with all the anxieties in life that eats all of your feelings away. I want to discuss this to my friends & family about it, but I don’t like to talk to people. I think all of them are the backstabbing type where their knives which are poison-coated that will slowly kill you inside.
I just hate myself thinking that idea about people. Maybe I’m just too traumatized from what happened during my childhood that it affected my interaction to other people who I may not be able to make friends or meet my someone that may hold a special place to my heart. I don’t like that. I just don’t know how to solve this dilemma of mine. Maybe I don’t know myself that well, after all.
I’m a fox lost in the woods which is his own home.